I'm not sure why this is happening right now but that's what happens. Shit happens. Bipolar episodes can creep up on you at any moment in your life. I have been stressed out of my mind, so I know that is definitely contributing to it (and of course I had to be on my period last week while I was falling into this dark hole). And I have been having quite a bit of anxiety attacks and my medications just don't feel like they are helping at all. I think another contributing factor is that my Doctors have been switching around my medications. Taking me off of some, putting me on others, switching my doses, putting me back on some and yada yada yada. Changing someone's medications can most definitely have a negative effect on that person. But at the same time, they are trying to find something that will work, so I kind of just have to deal with it.
What's even worse is that during all of this, the person I needed the most for support and to be there for me, ran away (not like literally). It really is a shame (and this person has known about my Bipolar for a hell of a long time) but if someone can't handle you at your worst (especially when it is something you can't control), then they don't deserve you at your best.
I saw these three posts while scrolling on Facebook last night.
This is what happens to me and right now it is to the extreme.
I'm trying to have faith and although it is hard, I know this will all pass soon and my life will get back on track.
And then I had one of my goofy weird moments last night. Sometimes I play with my hair and do stupid silly things with it. I decided to do a backwards "french braid" (the french part is at the top and you can't really see it but I don't do french braids correctly anyways). I felt like I had an elephant trunk ha ha ha.
By the way, I just heard Taylor Swift's new song, Bad Blood, with Kendrick Lamar. I love it! What do you all think about it?